This book has been thirteen years in the making. Twice I lost it because of hard drive crashes on two different computers in two differnt countries. Sounds agonizing, doesn’t it? Even my commitment to write this book was tested time and time again. If I continued to transfer all the supernatural stories that are on the pages of my mind to the pages of this computer, it would never get finished. Talk about commitment! Writing Jesus of my Agony has at times been, well, agonizing. It has been a long journey, but a journey worth taking.

 

...He totally turned my life upside down and inside out; and that darkness gave birth to the destiny and blessing that I walk in today. All that was required from me was a cup of coffee and a commitment. Through that, He showed up with His still, small voice and totally rocked my world and to this day changes the lives of everyone who hears this story...

...After arriving in Haiti in February of 2000, I spent the day walking around with my professional television gear videotaping a presentation for the growing start-up ministry.  I was comfortable with what I was doing, as I learned video production from six years of working in the pornography industry and three years producing network television shows for every major network market...

Chapter 1

 

...So after several trips in 2000, we loaded up a semi trailer of supplies and our family moved to Haiti to start our new life as missionaries. Within months, the church we were assigned to went from sixty to over six hundred people. In all that growth there were many people accepting Christ as their Savior for the first time. There are so many amazing testimonies of God’s goodness that I could fill a book just with those stories. It was supernatural and wonderful to see God seeking and saving those who were lost...

...In any third-world mission trips I have taken, I am always amazed by how many children there are. Haiti is no different. Wherever I go, I am trailed by a line of curious children. I can't drive through a village without hearing the children calling, "Pasta Dun...Pasta Dun..."

Chapter 2

...The second thing that collides with your senses about a Haitian home is the darkness. Many houses are constructed of wood strips with mud in the middle. This house had a sheet metal roof as opposed to a roof made of branches and leaves. There was very little light coming into this house because the only source was the doorway which was congested with people standing all around...

Chapter 3

...Before I could get my legs moving, a small frail hand came out and waved at me. “Alo…Alo,” came a voice from the trash. I couldn’t believe my eyes or ears! Could it be? Is it possible that a human was living under the trash? As I walked ever closer with my eyes firmly fixed on the opening of the trash heap, the small wrinkled face of a woman stared back at me...

Chapter 4

...It seemed to take forever for the Voodoo priest to unlock the padlocks to his temple. The noise of the metal lock and chain banging up against the sheet metal door increased my anxiety. It also didn’t help me as I looked to my left and right and saw many people from the village assembling. They were extra curious that day to investigate my early morning appearance at a Voodoo temple...

...As best as I could tell, the place looked the same, but I remained cautious as he opened the door to each room to look inside. Even while my expectation was to see some kind of damage, I saw nothing out of the ordinary--well, ordinary for a Voodoo temple that contains a bunch of weird stuff anyway...

...In one of our villages I began witnessing to a Voodoo priest who had his temple very near where we held our Kids Clubs. It was by chance that the best shade tree in the village was next to the temple. After several months of doing Kids Clubs and watching him, I believed he had enough “seed” sown into his mind (even at a child’s level) that he could understand salvation. I decided to try to lead him to Christ. It didn’t take long to realize this guy was different. There was an evil about him that seemed to totally block his mind from understanding me. This man was demonized to the point it thoroughly controlled his mind...

...“The devil wants to kill him. To undermine what God wants to do. The devil is a liar..."

The Devil Is A Liar - Acts 29
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...Then something rose up inside of me. It was a supernatural commitment that came up out of my spirit; and much like Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-Nego, I cried out loud for all of hell to hear: “God is my Deliverer! He has delivered me in the past, and He’ll do it again. But even if He chooses not to do it in my timing, as sure as heaven and hell is real, I am not going to bow down to you.” I got up, packed my truck, picked up my team and went into another village just as I had done many times before; and, after that, we went to another village. We continued on our business of telling people about Jesus...

...The greatest ammunition the devil has is using our past against us. As you can imagine, my past of working in the adult entertainment industry is dark and perverted. The truth, though, is that I had already become very good at rebellion long before I got involved in the pornography business. During my years in that industry, the devil just added to my mountain of sin. Writing about my past can be a painful experience. The list of people I hurt is quite lengthy, not including the thousands of lives I helped destroy by selling the smut. I never sold a single porn videotape, like some minion of his cat and mouse games. I sold cases of them! When we make a decision to industrialize his idols, we become stewards of his destruction...

Chapter 6

...After we prayed for him, I examined his body and nothing had changed. As I stood looking directly at the problem, I was disappointed that we didn't see with our own eyes this man healed. The evening crusades we were having were very successful, and I couldn't understand why we didn't see the same success for this man to be healed...

...The most defining moment of my life came from a telephone call from my pastor in the United States who gave me some information he knew and said I needed to come home immediately. I pleaded with him to allow me and the kids to stay in Haiti and work though the issues from there. What a mistake that would have been...

...Relief came like a raging river when, with very few words, they got the children out of the van and simply told me not to worry. They assured me that they would take care of everything. Then they turned away and held the children tightly as they walked them into the school. As I pulled away from the school building, I had a new determination...

Chapter 7

...How was it that I was so thoroughly surrounded by flames on every level yet walked out not even smelling like smoke? Many people who knew my spiritual walk and commitment to God were openly saying that I was washed up. They said that the fire that tested my commitment was too hot, too large and too strong for me to come out un-phased. Indeed, it was, but I wasn’t alone in the fire...

... Television production was something that came natural to me after my many years doing productions. The fit was perfect. I didn’t have to be Pastor Anybody or Missionary to Someplace. All I had to do was videotape his sermons, and I could do that. Edit his sermons? I’ve got that too. Duplicate them as well? Yep, got it! Finally, I would have to watch it on television to be sure the broadcast was good. Bingo...

Chapter 9

...I want to close by telling you a story about commitment and a woman who faced the fire...literally. Her name is Geeslyn. She lives in a village called Laffiteau in Haiti. Geeslyn was a very thin framed woman, but her height made her stand out as she towered over most everyone in the church. Her large cheek bones reminded me of the mountain people many miles from her village...

...What I am here to explain, to declare and shout from the rooftops is that in every fiery furnace of agony there is a fourth Man who not only isn’t intimidated in the fire, but He excels in it; and we are the ones who get to experience victory when He gets into the fire with us. No matter how agonizing the heat, His goal is not only to be with you when fires test your commitment, but to bring you through it so that you don’t even smell like smoke...

Commitment Speaks Louder Than Words

...The pages you have read have been typed on three laptops, two desktops, two smart phones, numerous rent-per-hour computers at airports and written out on napkins, notepads and even on a 2005 Nokia phone where I would text myself new revelations God would give me. It was written stuck in a snow storm, sitting on a beach, on top of a mountain, on rocks next to a river, alone in a hotel room, sitting in my bed in Ohio, sitting in my truck in Haiti, while cooking dinner for my children when I was single, watching my wife cook dinner after I was re-married and many hours of sitting at airports and on airplanes. Talk about commitment...

...As time-consuming and unorganized as it sounds as to how this book came about, the story must be told when I first preached the revelation described in this book. That day, not only did I need the fourth Man in the fire with me in some kind of general term, I needed Him to be my strength the very day I first let these words come from my heart and mouth. Out of every descriptive word that I could pull from the dictionary, it could only be described as one…agony...

 

...This book is written to the ones that can never escape this one thing—agony. This book is a declaration that says God may not take you out of the fire, but He promises to get into the fire with you. You may not evade agonizing times, but He promises to get into that pain and become the Jesus of your own agony....

 

© 2015 Don Adamson.  Acts 29 Missions, PO BOX 651 Vandalia, OH 45377

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